The Worst of E3 2017

I’ve often described E3 as the Superbowl, World Series and Stanley Cup of video game events all rolled into one. But among the amazing reveals and ground-breaking innovation showcased every June, a series of missteps and unintelligent decisions are also on display. The following are some of the most mindless, cringey and downright awful things to happen at E3 2017.

Any Game With a Trailer Featuring Shoutcasting

As much as companies want their multiplayer games to become juggernauts, not every game is going to be the next League of Legends. Fake shoutcasting or live analysis of a very casual or unreleased game makes my skin crawl. It’s not cute, it doesn’t get the crowd excited, and it’s certainly one of the most annoying things to feature in a trailer or showcase of a game.

Just watch and listen to this reveal for The Darwin Project and try not to cringe as soon as the chief shoutcaster starts to speak.

Jesse Wellens for Need for Speed

It’s one thing to have Youtubers as part of a trailer. It is another thing entirely to have them introduce the first real look at a game and then have them absolutely butcher that reveal. That’s exactly what Jesse Wellens did when he attempted to reveal more details about Need For Speed: Payback at EA’s conference.

While there are rumors of a failed teleprompter, I believe this massive blunder boils down to hiring a youtuber notorious for pranks and causing drama to handle an inherently serious event.

Oh yeah, and that handshake/bro hug thing is a personification of EA trying to be relatable while also being run by a bunch of slimy lizard men.

The Xbox One X Reveal

E3 2017 was Microsoft’s for the taking. The unveiling of Xbox Scorpio should have catapulted the company back into direct competition with Playstation. Instead, Microsoft showed off a console with a terrible name, an egregious price-point and no truly exclusive software.

As much as the internet had a field day with the Xbox One X creating the most cringe-worthy acronym in recent gaming memory, The name Xbox Scorpio would have been a much better decision. I see this name contributing to the same issues suffered by the Wii U, a console that failed to differentiate itself as the next generation to the average consumer.

xbox one x

The average consumer is also unwilling to pay $500 for a console. I understand the value that the Xbox One X presents for what is actually inside the system, but console players simply aren’t looking to spend that kind of money on a machine. With its current price point, I see the Xbox One X falling into an extremely niche market, one for people with the money to pay for a more expensive gaming PC that for some reason want to be anchored to a console architecture. In its current state, The Xbox One X (I’m already exhausted from writing the name) appears more like a Steam machine than the next generation of console already stigmatized for its inconsistent message.

Exclusives sell consoles. Without games, consoles are essentially electronic infused paperweights. As much as Xbox marketing wants to make you believe otherwise, not one game announced or revealed at the Xbox conference is a true Xbox One X exclusive. Every game will see another release on either Windows 10, less powerful Xbox One models or is a multiplatform title. Microsoft has been able to secure 12 month exclusivity for titles like Rise of the Tomb Raider, but even a one year wait isn’t compelling enough to make me spend up to $500.

I hope Microsoft can prove me wrong about this. A thriving and healthy competition between hardware makers creates a more competitive and beneficial market for consumers. But as I see it now, Xbox seems keen on digging themselves further into their own grave.

The PC Gaming Show

This was the worst conference I’ve seen in recent memory, only rivaled by the Konami press conferences of the past. I won’t even link it because no one, not even the people who put it on should have to endure the PC gaming conference at E3 2017.

Very Few Surprises

This year’s E3 showcase is being regarded as one of the most lackluster in recent memory. There simply wasn’t enough big surprises to warrant regarding E3 2017 as anything more than utterly predictable.

Bethesda’s showcase was the perfect representation of this phenomena, as every single announcement and official reveal was already predicted or leaked prior to the conference.

There were a few truly jaw-dropping . Metro: Exodus, The remake of Shadow of the Colussus and Nintendo’s surprise Metroid Prime 4 announcement left me jumping out of my seat, but little else elicited more than a subtle “That looks good” reaction.

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